In this blog post, we dive a little bit into inner child healing. By the end I encourage you to ask yourself a few tough, but important questions that might help kick-start your inner healing journey.
I was digging through some old photo albums recently and found some pictures of myself when I was around 13. They brought back all the memories- the good, the bad and the incredibly embarrassing (🥴)!
For those of you who didn’t know me then, let me paint a picture for you. I was an awkward, and quirky 13-year old girl. I was tall and slender with long limbs that I would frequently trip over. I wore glasses in bright colours that were too small for my face and had an over-bite, with a gap in between my two front teeth. I loved to read, especially Harry Potter and Percy Jackson and the Olympians and played violin, piano and watched history documentaries for fun. My fashion choices were….questionable and when I started wearing makeup, I was convinced that my eye shadow had to match my outfit. I had the quietest voice and would sit in the back of the class and read books under my desk.
But more than anything, I was impressionable. I idolized everyone. I wanted to be anything other myself. I wanted to be like the pretty girls with the cool outfits that I saw in Seventeen Magazine (y’all remember that cursed magazine!?). I also wanted long, straight hair that flowed in the wind and to be liked by my classmates.
Luckily as I got older, I matured and grew out of a lot those things. I grew into my tall, lanky frame, I switched to contact lenses and got braces. My style evolved, I learnt how to do my makeup and embraced my natural, curly hair. My voice got louder and even though I still sat in the back of the class for the rest of my schooling (I really loved that spot okay!), I still found a place for myself in this very big (and often very loud) world.
While flipping through the old pictures though, I realized that the “cool, fun” girl that idolized back in the day is now...well... me! My 13-year old self would be obsessed with the life I have currently. She would think I’m so cool and awesome and pretty and smart. She’d like my hair and how I dressed and think all my piercings are “sick”. She’d say “OMG you’ve been to England by yourself? You drive? You wear belly shirts?!” (I was obsessed with those back in the day 😅) She’d follow me around and ask me a million complex questions, that I probably won't know the answer to.
I was inspired to write this blog post, because I think as a society, we are so hard god damn hard on ourselves. We compare, pick apart and bully the f*ck out of ourselves a lot of the time. We never think we’re “enough," and we’re always seeking the validation from the people around us. Personally, I don’t think wanting validation from others is necessarily a bad thing, but I ask you (and myself) this question: who’s validation and approval is more important, the people around you or the little, awkward, 13-year old version of yourself?
Before you compare yourself to someone else, ask yourself, are YOU happy? Not the current you, but a previous version. Is the younger you impressed? Are they proud of your growth, your strength, your resilience? Do they think you’re cool and fun? If they aren’t impressed, ask them why. What about the current you are they disappointed with? Did you stop partaking in a hobby that you actually really enjoyed back then? Have you stopped wearing pink hair clips because some b* tch in 7th grade said they weren’t cool anymore?
What part of you or your life are they not satisfied with and how can you fix that?
It gives me comfort to know that 13-year old me, approves of the life I live now. She's happy, she's excited, but more importantly, she is proud.
I encourage you to ask the younger you this question today:
"Are you happy with the person I've become?"
Kids never lie.
Love,
-M
P.S Here's a few pictures of me from when I was 13 or14 years old. MAJOR throwback 😂
Comments